I will be able to’t imagine I assigned myself a tale about figs. As I kind this 2d sentence, ploddingly, whilst sitting in a sweatshirt and sports activities bra on my grey faux-suede Macy’s settee, I’m absolutely mindful that I’m pumping it with meaningless information about my clothes and whereabouts to distract from the topic to hand:
I don’t wish to write about figs. I have to write down about figs — contemporary ones, to be actual. It is my civic accountability as a client and distributor of virtual media as a result of in recent times, as I’ve hunkered down each and every morning to partake within the related accountability of consuming the web for breakfast, I’ve been served up massive, juicy platefuls of — you guessed it — figs.
They’re in all places in recent times. Have you spotted? If you apply any wellness blogger value her weight in purple Himalayan sea salt, my bet is sure. Maybe you haven’t registered the truth, however mark my 350 phrases, in case you mission into their Instagram feeds posthaste and scroll, you’re certain to be faced with proof. They’re everywhere culinary web pages, too.
I suppose I shouldn’t be shocked. Avocados were reigning ultimate for eons and it used to be just a subject of time earlier than another vulva-connoting fit to be eaten substance edged them off the toast/bowl throne. Though it’s exhausting to compete with nature’s butter, figs are giving avocados the most important run for his or her “likes” I’ve observed since that complete unicorn upheaval.
So what’s the large deal? Why are other folks so obsessed?
I’ve a couple of theories:
1. The distinctive mixture of candy flesh and comfortable pores and skin is long-deserving of an international platform. It’s principally candied cannibalism.
2. Fig Newtons are in the end exacting revenge for the entire occasions they’ve been maligned.
three. This is all a ploy to get other folks to consume extra ricotta (for the uninitiated, ricotta is the preferred adherent of selection for fig-to-toast suction — the peanut butter to its banana, if you are going to).
What do you suppose? Am I onto one thing? Are you getting figgy with it? Should I placed on an actual blouse? Let’s hash all of it out within the feedback.
Photo by way of Louisiana Mei Gelpi.